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Laughter lines in the face of fear

Posted on October 2nd, by Gordon in Havering. Comments Off

For National Poetry Day, these are words to a song I wrote (and never got round to recording) before the Scottish Independence Referendum:

There was a time
When whisky was the water of life
When pickaxe and shovel replaced knife
Over-the-top men and sword-dancing girls
when good folk were forced from the hills
takes a long spoon to sup in this place
of no relevance

We climbed a hill one summer
Seeking higher ground
We walked through the rain together
And this is what we found
Aspiration in the atmosphere
Laughter lines in the face of fear

Our time is now
Our people are working but poorer somehow
We are ruled by remote control
We are the overruled 

We climbed a hill one summer
Seeking higher ground
We walked through the rain together
And this is what we found
Aspiration in the atmosphere
laughter lines in the face of … Read More »


Gogglesphere

Posted on April 26th, by Gordon in Havering. Comments Off

My first “google-approved” googlesphere photo. That’s a 360 virtual tour to you and me. Here’s one from a recent trip up the Highlands (taken at Glencoe):

Views: Highland, UK by Gordon MacPherson



It only takes a minute

Posted on April 10th, by Gordon in Diarr ideas. Comments Off

I’ve been having fun today and yesterday with @OneMinuteBriefs‘s One minute brief challenge via twitter. It’s simple; they nominate a theme and you’ve got one minute to come up with an ad. Here are mine from today and yesterday, the headings indicate the theme

Over honest advertising

@OneMinuteBriefs #OVERHONEST Heinz beans pic.twitter.com/lcD0Ym48WP

— Gordon MacPherson (@Glasgogs) April 10, 2014

 

@OneMinuteBriefs #OVERHONEST Rohypnol pic.twitter.com/N9B797Hspd

— Gordon MacPherson (@Glasgogs) April 10, 2014

 

@OneMinuteBriefs #overhonest #advertising Lynx effect pic.twitter.com/4dM3PwexOj

— Gordon MacPherson (@Glasgogs) April 10, 2014

 

Dishwasher tablets

Which ‘won‘ something apparently, not sure what yet.

@OneMinuteBriefs #DISHWASHERTABLETS Tablets. For relief. pic.twitter.com/UF6BugRBmM

— Gordon MacPherson (@Glasgogs) April 9, 2014

 



Scottish Scunt

Posted on February 15th, by Gordon in Diarr ideas. Comments Off

I’m a passionate supporter of Scottish Independence and I think some of the proposals for independence don’t go far enough. I’d happily say tata to the Royal family for example and the idea of never using the pound again is the least of my concerns, despite the attempts of sneering capitalist George Osbourne, who trotted into our capital city in the last week to lecture us about what we can and cannot do.

It got me thinking about what a new Scottish currency would be called and what it would look like. I like the idea of the bawbee or the mickle but all joking aside, what about the Scunt? It’s a take on the Irish punt but with a Scottish twist. Well Nicloa hen, it’s yours if you need it… just gi’e us the nod.



Brew year competition

Posted on January 13th, by Gordon in Crafty Pieces. Comments Off

Brief: Stewart Brewing are taking on Fyne Ales in Battle of the Brewers #4 and are running a competition.

Each brewery will be creating a 5% flavoured stout which will be kept under wraps until the votes have been counted.

We require a design for the pump clip which will be displayed on the night of the battle in both venues. The design must include:

both breweries logos
the text “Battle of the Brewers”

On top of the global fame and fortune, the winner will receive a cask of each brewery’s beer as well as a ticket to the event on the 6th February.

My entry is above – wish me luck!



Tory party rebrand

Posted on October 31st, by Gordon in Parody. Comments Off

After the announcement the Westminster government will review the pesky green levies paid by the UK’s ‘Big Six’ power companies, the tory part have opted for a more apt brand.



Free Air iPad

Posted on October 23rd, by Gordon in Crafty Pieces, Diarr ideas. Comments Off

Don’t say I’m not good to you! Here is a genuine free download of a cut-out-and-keep Air iPad and I’m throwing in a complementary Air Guitar. Knock yourselves out!



Typophilia

Posted on September 11th, by Gordon in Typo's. Comments Off

An occupational hazard of being a graphic designer is spotting typographical errors everywhere. This is usually mind numbingly dull but it can have its moments. Here are a few I’ve collected in the last couple of years, admittedly three of these are doctored for my own geeky pleasure, see if you can spot the f*ck ups from the fake ups.



48 Hour Film Project

Posted on September 7th, by Gordon in Short Films I've made. Comments Off

This is a film I was involved in the making of for The Edinburgh round of the 48 Hour Film Project



Here’s Oscar!

Posted on February 27th, by Gordon in Parody. Comments Off

As far as bad taste goes, this is up their with my worst, fortunately for you, most ideas are never realised, this one however was spurred on by The Chip Shop Awards‘ One Minute Brief, the idea was to come up with an ad within 1 minute Advertising the new Oscar Pistorius range from Nike. Entries closed at 3pm today. Wish me luck.



Sketchbooks

Posted on February 2nd, by Gordon in Crafty Pieces. Comments Off

Amazing the things you discover when moving house! Here’s a collection of some of my doodles from sketchbooks, note pads and scraps of paper from the last few years.



Doppelginger

Posted on January 23rd, by Gordon in lookylikey. Comments Off

Is there a ginger version of every one of us out there? unless of course YOU are the ginger version of someone else.



Supper Size Me

Posted on December 29th, by Gordon in Diarr ideas, Parody. Comments Off

Dear BBC,

Please would you fund me to record a series called Supper Size Me, starring me, visiting 30 of Scotland’s best fish & Chip bars (as voted by the public prior to filming) starting at Anstruther and ending up at MacCallum’s of Troon (for example). I’ll eat nothing but fish suppers for 30 consecutive days, take in the scenery of Scotland’s countryside, towns, its folk, their banter, their music and their drink.

I will meet Nick Nairn and other celebrity Scottish chef’s along the way. I’ll get their opinion on what makes a good supper, we’ll meet fishermen, who actually catch the fish and we’ll hear what they think makes a decent supper.

I’ll visit Gillian McKeith who’ll analyse my health before, during and after the 30 day stint, she’ll reveal the health implications of eating nothing but fish suppers for 30 … Read More »



How BrewDog ruined Christmas

Posted on December 28th, by Gordon in Drink!. Comments Off

Christmas time, the only acceptable time of the year to drink one’s self into oblivion. Even your teetotal Auntie buys a case of lager of dubious quality, fir the guests ken?. Whatever’s on offer at the supermarket. Be it Fosters, Tennents, Carling, Carlsberg, Miller Genuine Draft whatever, it’s all the same, it won’t go to waste. And you’ll gratefully accept one despite it being only 10 in the morning. A decade ago that would certainly have been the case, but this ungrateful bastard has acquired standards over recent years and this common denominator horse piss simply won’t cut the mustard any more. The synthetic nectar is even harder to swallow when you take a closer look at the way it is made and marketed.

The whole British beer industry is sick, we were once a proud nation of brewers.

I used to … Read More »



Guile Gang Golly Golly Golly What’s it

Posted on September 21st, by Gordon in Diarr ideas. Comments Off

It struck me as soon as I’d seen it, The Glasgow Commonwealth Games 2014 Mascot is the love child of Guile from streetfighter and a Golly.



Concrete Shoes

Posted on September 12th, by Gordon in Havering, Sounds. Comments Off

It would appear I have played my last gig with Louise McVey & Cracks in the Concrete on Saturday past, at Tayvallich village hall, Argyll. I have been playing in this band for over 4 years.

Splitting from a band is so much like the end of a relationship, I’ve heard bands talking about this many times in interviews and it is only now that I understand exactly what they mean. You play in a band because you love doing so, just like being close with someone and the longer term it is, the more emotionally you have invested in the project.

Dunstaffnage

Our first gig was at the now defunct Dunstaffnage festival back in July 2008 (pictured above), we filled the slot of a band called Hamper who were unable to make it. We’d rehearsed a handful of times, back then the … Read More »



Prophecies of fire

Posted on August 20th, by Gordon in Havering. Comments Off

There is some spooky shit going on with me unintentionally predicting fire. In 1999 while studying at Dundee’s illustrious art college, I was confined to my Baruffati-spliced bedroom for about 2 months with a glandular fever type of virus, during that time I borrowed a mate’s 4-track recorder and set about recording a bunch of songs, I named the resulting tape Live By Fire. A few months later the very flat, I and three others were living in, went up in flames. 

And recently, my brother proudly sent me a picture of his VW campervan after some hard work he had been doing on the bodywork.

For “a laugh” I sent him back the same picture, slightly enhanced:

A couple of weeks after that, while my bro took her out on a test drive, the engine burst into flames, sadly spelling the end of his … Read More »



Right Royally Bankered

Posted on June 27th, by Gordon in Havering. Comments Off

 

Here’s to the bank that’s been taking from me for 24 years, here’s to the bank that robbed me by illegally charging me throughout my student years, here’s to the bank that illegally sold me Payment Protection Insurance on a loan, here’s to the bank that in the last week made my wages disappear, here’s to the bank I’ll soon be leaving, The Royal Bank of Scotland, the shittest bank in the world.



Scotland, a proud wee nation

Posted on April 13th, by Gordon in Parody, Typo's. Comments Off

Couldn’t help myself when I saw the propaganda that plopped through the letterbox today.

 



Keep Calm and F*ck Off

Posted on April 1st, by Gordon in Parody. Comments Off

 



Friends On Benefits

Posted on March 31st, by Gordon in Parody. 1 Comment

Another RomCom starring Justin Trousersnake, destined for the inflight movie bargain bin, with a title that doesnae quite work this side of the pond. Ah well, us Brits are used to overlooking these small details in order to bathe in the infinite optimism of the Hollywood conveyer belt. Well not me, how about giving the film a nice gritty British twist, set it on a run down council estate, give the main character a major disadvantage – maybe an alcohol/drug/violence addiction, drag the viewers through his daily trudge to illustrate how the odds are stacked against him, dangle a glimmer of hope in front of the main character, this time in the shape of Justin Timberlake who shows the man a way out of his predicament. Dash those hopes by proving that in the end, despite all efforts, his disadvantages … Read More »



Dark Knight Rises and shines

Posted on March 26th, by Gordon in Short Films I've made. Comments Off

You have to get up pretty early in the morning to catch out the Batman!



Meat your maker

Posted on March 16th, by Gordon in Havering. Comments Off

I felt it was only appropriate to repackage the nation’s favourite pork products following the revelation that over indulgence will kill you. “everything in moderation” it is then, maybe I’ll forego the usual fry-up this weekend, bummer!

 

 



Tunnock’s Ear Cakes

Posted on February 28th, by Gordon in Diarr ideas. Comments Off

If only Boyd Tunnock hadn’t stopped taking my calls, he’d have heard of this first. Well, the eyes and ears of regulars to this blog are in for a treat as I proudly present Tunnock Teacake styled headphones. If it’s good enough for Gillian Kyle to milk a pillar of Scottish cuisine for all it’s worth, then it’s good enough for Power to the Pencil!

 



Cappletalism

Posted on February 21st, by Gordon in Havering. Comments Off

Has Apple become everything Steve Jobs pledged to fight against back in good ol’ 1984?

The infamous ad heralding the arrival of the Apple computer, which was to change everything for the better. A play on George Orwell’s Nineteen Eighty-Four, a book about brainwashing and slavery.

Are Apple guilty of slavery?

video platform video management video solutions video player

Apple use Foxconn, a Chinese electronics assembly company that has been accused of “military” style conditions, so bad it drives some employees to throwing themselves off their buildings. The rate of suicides are so high they have had to fit nets round their buildings. That’s one way of dealing with it, how about improving the conditions so employees don’t feel the need to kill themselves?

Are Apple guilty of brainwashing?

You don’t have to search very far on the internet to find videos of consumers being … Read More »



Mullan to finally have a bath

Posted on February 4th, by Gordon in Parody. Comments Off

A swimming pool in Glasgow whose closure led to violent clashes with old firm fans is to be reopened by professional tramp Peter Mullan on the condition he finally has a bath.

Glasgow City Council closed Govanhill Baths in March 2001 saying cleanliness was no longer attractive to Glaswegians.

Junkies occupied the historic building but were removed that August.

On Saturday, Mr Mullan will launch the first phase of a four-year plan to fully scrub himself.

The campaign to save the building has been led by the Govanhill Baths Community Trust.

Community cleanliness

Trust Member Tam Shanks said bathing would help regenerate the area and play an important role in boosting community cleanliness.

“We’re converting the auld steamie into a games room complete with a dart board that can be used by the local community and also rented out for events.”

Mr Shanks said the Trust was … Read More »



Quantitive Teasing

Posted on January 24th, by Gordon in Parody. Comments Off

The new Euro bank-note isn’t worth the blog it’s published on…
Masterminded by Blethering Pish picture by Power to the Pencil.



Playlaudie

Posted on January 21st, by Gordon in Diarr ideas. Comments Off

Jazz Mag for Salmond’s New Scotland.
Words by Blethering Pish picture by Power to the Pencil.



De Livery

Posted on December 29th, by Gordon in Havering. 1 Comment

I was recently asked to come up with a design for van livery for a company based here in Glasgow, at lunch I took a stroll out to check out vans in the city for inspiration when I stumbled upon this beezer. It looks like it was done entirely with electrical tape, a real treat of a colour scheme too of broon, yelly, black and red. These guys proudly boast that they do ‘home improvements’… would you trust them to improve your home?



Santa’s Chat Sack

Posted on December 20th, by Gordon in Parody. Comments Off

One for all you disillusioned Santas out there.



Christmas with Gordon

Posted on December 11th, by Gordon in Parody. 2 comments

Anyone else failing to get into the festive spirit this year? worry not, help is at hand from TV’s foul mouthed chef Gordon Ramsay who launches his new book, it’s got everything you need to know about getting to grips with your bird this year. Gordon gets a new one every year. I on the other hand have been with the same woman for 12 years now… now that’s dedication!



A Claus for Concern

Posted on November 27th, by Gordon in Havering. 3 comments

Just the other day at work, I attempted to voice a dilemma I expect to be having in a few years time when my own son will be old enough to be lied to. Should I lie to him about Santa Claus?

When I was wee, my older brother was pretty freaked out about the idea of a man he didn’t know coming down our chimney and into the house, my mum had to reassure him at an early age that Santa was fictitious, he soon relayed that onto myself and our younger brother. So if I ever did believe in Santa Claus it wasn’t for long and indeed I have no memory of ever believing in him.

Immediately my question was met with horror! I was accused of being ‘soulless’. What exactly is soulless about protecting my son from a fat, … Read More »



Boomeranger

Posted on November 24th, by Gordon in Diarr ideas. Comments Off

Maybe it’s time I made ‘that’ call to the BBC’s Dragon’s Den… forget the Crapp App, nevermind Squarego, this is it, this is a concept that keeps on coming back. Ladies and gentlemen, may I introduce to you The Boomeranger – the boomerang that is also a coat hanger, two handy objects in one convenient package – it’s a coat hanger that you just won’t be able to throw out and a boomerang that is easier to catch… need I say anymore?



When Is a Twix not a Twix?

Posted on November 9th, by Gordon in Havering. Comments Off

Should a Twix, when sold in singles, still be called a Twix? What about an Onix? or a Twink? or how about a Twone?



Square go anyone?

Posted on October 22nd, by Gordon in Diarr ideas. Comments Off

I’ve had an idea for a lucrative new toy that could take on the mighty Lego, it would be just like Lego but instead of having round bits, it would have square bits… I call this invention “Squarego”. I see it really catching on especially in Scotland, I can hear “Squarego!” being shouted in school playgrounds up and down this godforsaken country already.



Ed Millhouse-Band

Posted on October 17th, by Gordon in lookylikey. Comments Off

It started off as a simple exercise to illustrate the similarities I see between Ed Milliband MP and Millhouse from the Simpsons but ended up being something a lot more sinister. That’s Ed on the right by the way…



Golden Archies

Posted on September 18th, by Gordon in Crafty Pieces. Comments Off

I’ve been sifting through an old external hard drive before I wipe it and use it for back-up purposes. 99.9% of it’s contents is utter pish but this was a pop-up card I made a few year back that didnae get the outing it deserved



Double Dopple Dappy Gaga

Posted on August 7th, by Gordon in Parody. Comments Off

Admittedly I’ve had an inkling for a while and for anyone that knows me, the likelihood of a celebrity posing as two or more different celebrities is precisely the sort of thing that keeps me up at night. After a shift that would have had Sherlock Holmes choking on his crack pipe, it would appear I’ve made an earth-shattering discovery.

Dappy, the brains behind N Dubz appears to be living a double life. Under that ridiculous hat lies the confused tiny mind of none other than Lady Gaga. It is clear from the photos above that they are the same person.

The revelation is particularly convenient for me as I can now direct all of my hate for the two celebrities at one person. Result!

 



Facebook Fatigue

Posted on May 7th, by Gordon in Techno Fear. Comments Off

Jesus, why have I just logged in again? it’s starting to become a really bad habit, I don’t even realise I’m doing it sometimes. I start typing faceb… the browser does the rest, I log in, scroll through the ‘news feed’ see what my ‘friends’ are up to, I end up reading about friends of theirs, looking through photo albums of people I don’t know and before I know it I’ve lost half an hour but despite this I’ll do the same again tomorrow.

It’s handy for events and it’s handy for keeping in touch with friends/family that live overseas etc. but for the most part it is narcissistic drivel and it’s stealing our attention spans… and I really need to get a grip!


Weegies

Posted on May 7th, by Gordon in Havering. Comments Off

And by ‘weegie’ I don’t mean all Glaswegians but a very distinct kind of Glaswegian. The kind that nicked my girlfriend’s bike less than a month after she moved here. The kind that throw bottles in to crowds. The same kind that see no shame in randomly approaching you and asking you for a pound towards their bus fare and that is exactly my problem. I lived in Aberdeen for 7 years, Union Street was a favourite spot for those of the begging variety, some of whom genuinely looked homeless, I took pity on many an occasion and handed over some hard earned change. I always feel that if someone asks you for something, you should have the decency to acknowledge their existence, I watched a lot people ignoring these folk and that used to wind me up. Even … Read More »


Spot the Difference

Posted on March 19th, by Gordon in Havering. Comments Off

I wasn’t sure how to feel about this at first because I wasn’t asked, but artist David Russon helped himself to a photo I posted on Facebook (below) and turned it into this painting – you’ll notice it doesn’t so much as bear a passing resemblance to my photo, it’s a straight copy. It seems the Artist’s ethic is exactly that. Ok, I’m strangely flattered to be part of that process but to have been asked would have been nice ay?



Meerkat?

Posted on February 1st, by Gordon in Sounds. Comments Off

Compare the Train Conductor by mrgogs A recording of the train conductor on a trip to Aberdeen. Sounds a bit like thon Meerkat chap, wouldn’t you say? Simples!


Mackintache

Posted on January 11th, by Gordon in Crafty Pieces. Comments Off

2011’s off to an encouraging start with the killing of twa resolutions with this one post. I promise to post atleast once a week and I’m making an effort to bring most of the artwork I built up for Power to the Stencil to life, as well as creating new work in the same style. Watch this space and thanks for reading. Gordon.



Crap App

Posted on November 8th, by Gordon in Diarr ideas. 1 Comment

Been hoping to delve into App development for a while now. I’ve a few ideas up my sleeve including this one. Now all I have to do is convince Gillian McKeith it’s a goer…



Flying Is Falling

Posted on October 23rd, by Gordon in Short Films I've made. Comments Off

A triptych of trick of the light.



White Bikes

Posted on April 30th, by Gordon in Short Films I've made. Comments Off

50 white bikes set free on the streets of Glasgow for the public to use at no charge, in a simple statement of anti-greed and healthy living. They’ve all been nicked since but here is the video by Central Station to which I contributed some footage:

White Bikes from Central Station on Vimeo.



M&S Wifebeater

Posted on October 23rd, by Gordon in Short Films I've made. Comments Off

This isn’t just any premium strength Wife-beater lager…



Glasgow Library Observations

Posted on October 13th, by Gordon in Havering. Comments Off

Aren’t libraries great? they are magic places – full of books, newspapers, Wifi access even, they are free, open to the general public and they are open right through the day and often till late evening.

The Mitchell Library, the biggest library in Scotland is the best I’ve encountered yet – it has the most unbelievable carpets you’re ever likely to clap your eyes on. It is as if I have travelled back 30 years in time.

Glasgow Libraries however don’t do SHHHH! only cos Glaswegians on the whole can’t do SHHHH! it is commonplace for punters to shout at the counter staff, who happily shout back – there are music carrells which are not sound-insulated where saxophonists and flutists come to practice there scales, if you want to concentrate you’re best bringing a pair of headphones and playing some loud music … Read More »



Wrong Way Down

Posted on September 2nd, by Gordon in Short Films I've made. Comments Off

My small town take on Ewan McGregor and that other guy’s Legendary bike trek